As we continue a discussion on “balance,” you may have noticed that I did not post last week. Some have asked me what happened.  My response is that sometimes the most important examples are not written, but lived. I had to balance my desire to write with my desire to spend time with my youngest son. Thus I spent time with him last weekend at an 11-year-old Boy Scout camp. I had a great time. Due to some significant demands on my time, I do not get to spend a lot of one-on-one time with my sons. The campout with my son helped us to maintain balance in our relationship.

How do you maintain balance in your life? What are the different dimensions of your life that require your time and attention? I would like to identify various aspects of our life that often demand care and consideration. This list is not comprehensive and you will likely identify other important dimensions of your own life.

Interpersonal  – the first three dimensions involve our relationships with others.

Spiritual – our relationship with God.

Social Intimate – our relationships with our closest confidants. This typically constitutes family, marital, and closest friendships.

Social Support – our relationships with friends, neighbors, colleagues, and others. Some would consider their relationships with pets is an important part of this dimension.

Intra-personal – the next five dimensions involve aspects of our individual self.

Behavioral – the ability to live free of addiction or other problematic behavior.

Emotional – the ability to experience the full range of emotion and to manage behavior in the presence of strong emotion; the ability to experience positive emotion and to resolve unwanted distress or negative emotion.

Intellectual – the ability to learn, acquire intelligence, and integrate new information in an adaptive manner.

Mental – the ability to think flexibly and to determine which principles, rules, or guidelines might apply in various situations.

Coping – the ability to solve problems and to deal with life’s stressors; the ability to prevent or minimize stress in the future.

Temporal – the last three dimensions have to do with our tangible, physical world.

Financial – the ability to provide the necessities of life and to meet one’s obligations; the ability to live within one’s means.

Physical/Health – the ability to maintain physical wellness and to minimize sickness and disease.

Environmental – the ability to live in harmony with one’s environment and to maintain safety and shelter from the elements; the ability to conserve nature and to reasonably preserve natural resources.

One of life’s greatest challenges is to have the wisdom to balance the different dimensions of one’s life. Rarely is one in a state of perfect balance, and it is necessary to make adjustments day-to-day week-to- week and year-to-year. It is not uncommon to find ourselves out of balance. We occasionally sacrifice that which we want most for that which we want in the moment. Our lives are often comparable to a buffet of choices, and we often overextend ourselves in one area at the expense of another. Some of the most important choices we make are to say no to things that we might want.

One helpful strategy to maintain balance is to engage in activities that meet multiple needs. For example, when my family first moved to Arizona several years ago from Georgia my body clock was three hours ahead and had not adjusted to the time zone changes. In addition I had to conduct some business in Georgia by phone early one morning. While my family was still asleep I woke up and needed to have a conversation with a colleague. That morning I went outside and went for a walk while I had my conversation with a colleague. From then on I developed a habit of going on a daily walk with my wife. For the past several years we have walked almost every day together. I have found that these walks meet my social – intimate needs, emotional needs and physical health needs. They often meet other needs as well, depending on the topics of our conversations.

When one dimension of our lives requires so much time, energy, and attention that other dimensions are impoverished, we are in a state of imbalance. Thus I did not post last week as I attempted to meet my son’s needs for parental attention and time.

Can you think of other dimensions of your life that need time, energy, and attention? What are your habits or patterns in your life that help you maintain balance? Please ponder and share.